Sabotage

I stabbed myself in the eye
And tore out my heart
I keep them in a drawer
In the dark
For the moments I may forget
What you did –
I’ll force myself to relive

–self-inflicted depression

Cards on the Table

My heart was cracked open
I pinned a little piece of it
To everyone’s sleeve
My mouth never closed
Not even in the silence of sleep
The head buried in my phone
Convinced me I’m better off alone
Never allowing myself to be full grown

Don’t bother being yourself

Dear Mr. President

A leech,
A finger on your head
Ready to be pinched
How do you go to bed?
Sucking,
Until your face turns blue
Emptying pockets
Can’t hide from the truth
While you’re carousing,
We’re browsing
We’ll out you too

Venus and Tannhauser

Guns up
Trigger tensed
Pretense
I thought of you
Hard exterior
Warm inside
I closed my eyes
And dreamt of dying
A soft pressure
A deafening blow
I watched you go

Pain of Infatuation

Praying it would be the same
Hoping to never feel this way again
A moment suspended in time
Trapped in my own mind
Reliving that summer
Again and Again
Was it all pretend?
The highlights
Of your dewy skin
Our youth
Beckoning

The Tempest

Waves crashing on my shore
The wet sand
As it was before
The moonlight
Shone so bright
It was just another night
But something wasn’t right
I screamed out
At the top of my lungs
It was all in good fun
Until I fell to my knees
Feeling everything
I just wanted to be free

Arcadia, Arcadia

Mania
Quiescence
Recrudesce
Arcadia, Arcadia

The Burning Bush

The leaves fell gingerly
As the wind blew the flames
Infinitesimally I felt
It was all the same
The world roared around me
But it never said my name
I ran into the brush
Hoping it would change
Like a phoenix
ReBourn
I found my place

Spin Cycle

I ran in a circle
Just to find that it never ends
My emotions begging to bend
So I cried to my friends
Who told me it all depends
If, I’m okay
If, it’s just today
That making me feel so shitty
White girl problems
It’s nothing to pity